My Son

This week is a monumental week for Tyler. He will graduate from Telesis with honors as the Valedictorian of his class. He is a natural student, meaning that he is able to do what is asked of him without a lot of effort. There are people that have to work hard for their grades and then there are those that it learning comes naturally; he is the second type of student. These are usually the students that teachers don’t care for because they don’t have to put forth as much effort as the other students in the class. Tyler like natural students can at sometimes be a pain in a teacher’s side but when the teacher truly cares about him he try hard to please that teacher. As a young boy Tyler succeeded in everything he did. He was good at soccer, the two years he played. He took some karate when he was younger and was very good at that. He went through a phase of only video games and he as very good at that. So good, that I was worried that he was going to end up being one of those boys that played Dungeons and Dragons in my basement. Then I realized I wasn’t going to get him the game and I didn’t have a basement. . Lucky me! Not that being a nerd is a bad thing, heck his mother is one of the biggest nerds ever. I just wanted him to be a social nerd that knew how to talk to girlsHe was in Babes in Toyland when he was 9 but didn’t do anything on stage until his sophomore year of high school. After doing The Secret Garden, Tyler caught the acting bug, and the rest is what they call history. He started taking dance his junior year to help him move more gracefully. He has enjoyed dance and you can see that when he is on stage. He is a natural actor or I should say a natural funny man. I really like to think that came from me because I am very funny. He is a very sarcastic person and I know that is all me. Sometimes when he says things I wonder why he would say what he has said, but then I know why. Like his momma sometimes he has Homer Simpson moments and just says what he is thinking before thinking it through. I am proud of Tyler in all that he has accomplished but I would like to touch on just a few things to brag about. First off, he is a good boy. We have had some uncomfortable talks these last few weeks and I am guessing more to come, but I am glad that he feels like he can talk to me about anything. Well maybe not everything. Second, he does try to do what is right. None of us are perfect and we all make mistakes, but Tyler does try to choose the right and most of the time succeeds. Third, the love he has for his sisters. This might surprise some of you but, he does love both of his sisters. I have heard and seen him defend Katie and Noelle. Yes, he would rather hang out with Noelle but he does love both of them. I know when Katie and Tyler are older they will be close like Kathy, Amy, and I are now. Finally, he has had to grow up and take on a different role in the last 18 months. He has become more of the taxi driver than I am. He has to keep track to dance schedules, glee time, and other important places that not only he has to be too but also where the girls have to be too. I love my kids equally! They all have different qualities that make them special, but this week is Tyler’s week. I can still remember his first cry and the doctor placing him on my chest. I can remember being so sick in the hospital but worried that the nurse who had to test Tyler for strep didn’t have on the correct type of tag. I can remember when he started school and told me, “Mom you can shake my hand now because I am too big to give kisses to anymore.” I can remember when he was baptized and received the Holy Ghost, when he received the priesthood. Moms are like elephants we don’t forget. I can’t believe he is old enough to graduate. It seems like yesterday when he was my little baby boy and now he is a man. I would like to personally thank a few teachers that have really helped Tyler these last few years. As a teacher I know the difference you can make in a child’s life. First Coach Denney, thank you for making my son feel that athletes are not the most important group of kids at school. You taught him that there are some coaches that put grades first. This says so much about your Chris! Mr. Leckrone, you have taught Tyler to use punctuation. This has not been an easy task for you. You have also taught him to think and ask the tough questions. You have let him explore his creative side and this is what has helped him write beautiful poems and two wonderful screen plays. Last but not least by any stretch of the imagination is Mr. Stewart. This man has spent hours helping Tyler get his scholarship. He has also taken Tyler under his wing as a mentor. He has been one of Tyler’s biggest cheerleaders at school and I thank him for that. Josh, you will be the guy that Tyler goes to when he has questions these next few years. I can’t ever thank you enough. Tyler, I love you and I am very proud of you. You will accomplish many great things in your life. I would like to give you some advice that one day you might find important. Pray always, this will help you get through the good times but it will help you especially through the tough times. Second, remember who you are and that your name is not only yours but it belongs to your entire family. Don’t do anything that will ruin the reputation your name has. Third, be kind to those around you. This is not always easy to do, but you will go farther in life if you do. Remember to use the magic words please and thank you. Thank you is so important to say to people. Last but not least, remember to not do anything that you will not be able to look yourself in the mirror for later. If you do then repent as soon as you can, Jesus Christ is your personal Savior and he wants you to be happy. Sin will never make you happy in the long run; it just makes you feel good in the moment. Well one more thing, remember who you are and what you have been taught. I love you son!

Why I Do What I Do

It is Mother’s Day and I thought it would be appropriate to write today, about the importance of mothers. I have been blessed to have three wonderful mothers in my life. First, my own mom Maggie Howells, she gave birth to me and taught me the importance of taking a chance and following a dream. Second, my step mom Nola Philpot, she taught me about the importance of being a listener. Third, is Kim Fronek, she taught me that just because you are not blood does not mean you can’t love someone like a mom. Each of these women is important to my life and has led me to become the mom I am today. Now I would be remiss if I didn’t mention my biggest cheerleader growing up and that was my Grandma Philpot. All three moms know that they have a piece of my heart but growing up for me would have been less than desirable if my Grandma Philpot wasn’t there. I often feel bad for my cousins and younger siblings because they didn’t get to see or know the Grandma I saw. My mom like all mothers had her flaws. She was an excellent cook, cleaner, canner, and seamstress. It is sad when your lowest grade in my entire education comes in sewing and you had the best teacher in your own home. My mom taught us to work together and try hard. Nola had to become a mom instantly to a teenage daughter. That alone is worth a ribbon. Kim came into my life when I needed a mom close by. We had just moved to Havasu and didn’t know very many people. I was her visiting teacher and the rest is what they say, history. Each of these ladies has shown me what I need to do to become a better mom. I am not a perfect mom, far from it. I have my struggles like all other moms, mine just happen to be more obvious than others. My biggest struggle with motherhood is my homemaking skills. This does not include my house or laundry just my lack of cooking abilities (or desires) and craftiness or lack of. When you grow up in a “Mormon” household there are some expectations. First, cooking is the most important thing you can do for your family. My sisters enjoyed cooking so I was happy to let them stay in the kitchen and I would fold laundry. Trust me there was not complaining from my siblings or the mom of the house while I was folding laundry and not cooking. This left me as a poor excuse as a mom. I can cook, but I hate it! I am not a cook baker either as my friend Brian and Leslie will attest to. My skills as a mom have been housecleaning, laundry, organization, and calendaring. These are all very important skills to have as a mom. This does not mean that sometimes my house looks like a hurricane it or that I am late picking someone up from a certain place. It does mean I am a work in process. My greatest skill is my love for my kids. I love them more than anything else on earth. This is the key to being a great mom. This week I had an opportunity to take off my mother’s hat for a few hours. It was fun and I loved being a woman and having someone take care of me for a change. There isn’t anyone that doesn’t love getting gifts. I enjoyed being told I was wonderful and beautiful. Who wouldn’t? I felt like a how many women must feel when a gentleman treats them nicely. I have been reminded this week of my high moral stance on certain items. I have reminded people that my high moral stance doesn’t need to be everyone’s but when the children were younger there were promises made on what their moral up bringing would be. Now that I am a single mom I have to keep those moral stances no matter what. This week I thought long and hard about the moral high ground I have kept. This is was very easy when no one was interested or when someone was 7,500 miles away. This was not so easy when they were right in front of me. What I learned was the reason why my moral high ground is so important to me is that I have to be the example no matter what. I also learned that someone would lose respect for me if I all of the sudden threw out “rule number 1.” This does not mean I am right on everything, it just means I am right in decisions that I made long ago. So the reason why I do what I do is because I want my kids to know that when mom says something it is not just lip service. When I say certain things I mean it and I also follow it. It is not always easy to do the right thing but it is always right! Wrong is never right and right is never wrong. I would like to conclude by quoting President Abraham Lincoln, “All that I am or ever hope to be I owe to my angel Mother.” Thanks again to all of those moms to my kids and myself.

What Matters Most

So I have been trying to write a blog since I wrote my now famous one on baseball. It is hard to top that blog because I really do love baseball. I wrote one last week and deleted it because I didn’t want it to bite me in the rear later, plus I was doing what was done to me and that never solves the problem. So here is my blog on what matters most. Saturday started off like most other Saturdays in the Fallis home; breakfast, laundry, shopping, and of course baseball. I was sitting next to one of my friends and her son was pitching. This was his first time pitching after coming off the dl. She was stressed and giving him a few pointers. She then told me she was going to have a heart attack. I informed her I knew CPR, she then let me know if that happened I was to call the fire department and I needed to choose what fireman gave her mouth to mouth. We laughed and then the next inning he was playing first base again. I was at a friend’s house when I got a very disturbing phone call on Saturday night. Tyler called in a panic and told me he was having a hard time seeing in the light. He was scared and I told him we would see the eye doctor on Monday. I didn’t think much of it during dinner and called my friend (the pitcher’s mom) after my dinner. She asked some questions that I didn’t know the answer to. I told her I would find out and I would call her tomorrow. Then I did what you should never do, go onto the internet. I am sure that some of these medical websites are very good but, it can cause moms undue stress and pressure. By Sunday morning I was a wreck, I had hardly slept the night before and it really showed. Tyler had answered one of the questions that the eye doctor had and that was not the answer I wanted. Again, I had spent too much time looking stuff up and was now an expert in the area. The only problem is I didn’t understand what they were talking about and this caused me to worry more. I knew this; Tyler was very nervous and worried about his eyes. His eye pressure was high last year when he had his checkup and high eye pressure is a sign of glaucoma. He hasn’t once complained about his eyes other than the light is causing him stress and that was almost a year ago. So I knew I needed to know worry. I talked to someone else who knew what they were talking about and I had some idea of what to expect today. Tyler got up this morning for seminary with I am sure very little sleep, I know this because there was a lot of tossing and turning in my bed and I heard him up quite a few times. He posted on FB the following, “I'm beyond nervous for today. I am already terrified about going to the doctors but I'm terrified because I think my eyes are getting worse....” This does not make a mom feel any better. I went to the doctors and I got to have my heart attack moment with my baseball friend. Tyler’s pressures in his eyes are at 28. This is not real good but it could be way worse. Tyler will start some meds on Friday that will help prevent him from losing his sight. He won’t go blind today so that is a great sign. He also will be able to watch movies and read books him momma doesn’t like. His plans for making some extra cash won’t work out. (Sorry Tyler, you are not going to sale MJ) Today I figured out what matters most, not that I hadn’t already known but this helped me clarify my list. First, my kids mean more than anything in the world to me. Like most moms or parents that I know I would take a bullet for my kids. Second, the health of my kids is more important than my own health. Third, prayers work, we didn’t get the news I wanted today but we got news that was still a blessing. Today’s news could have been a lot worse. Lastly, I am blessed more than I deserve to be. Our Father in Heaven wants to bless us and today I felt those blessing. I am grateful for priesthood blessings and those men who are worthy to give them. I am also grateful to those wives that let their husband serve my family last night. I had more than one friend tell me they would drop what they were doing so that they could be with me today if it was bad news. Tyler’s journey is only beginning but, because of his support staff. This includes all of his friends and their mommas. I am going to need everyone on his support staff and mine to remind him to wear a hat while at work. This will give his eyes a little more protection. Tomorrow is another day and I will sleep like a baby tonight, if I can get it cool enough in the house. I am looking forward another baseball game, checking spelling homework, and the normalcy of my life. Thank goodness for great blessings.

Why I Love Baseball

I grew up in a sports family. I didn’t play sports mainly because I stunk at it but all of my siblings did. I was more into drama, music, and debate. I know some of you are thinking debate, who knew. My dad gave me some very good advice my junior year of high school. He said, “Florence, you don’t play sports but boys like girls that at least know something about sports. I would suggest that you learn the rules so you can talk sports with guys.” I followed his advice and followed the top three sports in my home; golf, basketball, and football. Golf was and still is the most important sport and then the other two followed. I sat with my dad on Saturdays and Sundays and learned what the penalties the refs were calling, what the rules were, and how to keep score. I also learned to pick a favorite team and not be a fickle fan. I don’t know if my dad has a favorite NFL team because most of the football we watched was college. I know that his favorite team for college hoops or football was whomever BYU was playing or the UTES.

I have followed the NFL and NBA for years. I have been to a handful of Utah Jazz games and a few Sacramento Kings games. I have never been to a NFL game but I love the 49ers. This goes back to my love affair with Steve Young. If you lived in Havasu when he showed up the LDS church you might remember as I knocked younger children over to get his autograph. Not a proud moment in my life but I will guarantee not one of those kids knew any of his stats. Plus he has always been on my list of freebies. Meaning that if he shows up at my door, I have to leave no questions asked.

Over the years I started to watch baseball. I didn’t mind baseball but found it to be boring to watch. Mainly because some games can last for a LONG time, there is no time limit like the NBA or NFL. Yes, I know that with time outs, penalties, and OT there is no set time but usually games are only about 2 hours. Sometimes baseball games can last way longer than that. But when MLB founded the Arizona Diamondbacks in 1998 I started to follow baseball. It was fun seeing them win the World Series in 2001. There were those that wanted the Yankees to win just because of what had happened earlier in the fall but the Dbacks came out on top.

Last summer one of my favorite Telesis families invited me to watch their boys play little league. I had supported these boys before if there was a car wash or other fundraisers but I had never been to a game. I found myself so grateful that this mom could ask me to come and that the boys were excited that I came. I started going to Sara Park and traveled a few times to Kingman. It was the best thing this mom could have done for me. Since then I have looked forward to springtime because that meant that baseball season would start again.

This last week the girls and I went to see 7 baseball games in 6 days. Now remember my kids don’t play sports. They are a lot like their mom in this area. So 7 games when you don’t have kids that play is incredible, in fact on Wednesday night I felt like a celebrity at the 2 games I attended. The boys from school, (because I haven’t been to any girls games yet) have been so excited to see me. Their parents think I am really going out of my way to see them play. To be honest I love watching baseball.

This year baseball has a whole new meaning for me. Why you might ask? Well because I get to go to my first MLB game. I don’t get to sit in the 6 dollar seats (which has now turned into rule 6 from my friend) I get to sit where I might be able to catch a foul ball if the batter hits the ball late. I might get to see a homerun hit because of the stadium I am going to, but more importantly like when you take your child to Disneyland for the first time you get to enjoy the park more because you are seeing it through their eyes. My friend gets to see me watch a game for the first time.

Now, my dad has laughed because growing up baseball would not have been a game he would have sat down and watched but he is starting to understand my love affair with the game. It is a thinking man’s game. It is a game that you have to have patience to watch but it is worth the wait. It is a game where the rules are easy to understand and there are not penalty flags being thrown. What is there to like about the game? Well you can spit sunflower seeds; I know you can do that at a football game, but not at a basketball game. My girls are getting very good at that and I would like to thank Coach Bagshaw for that. It is a game where if you have to go to the restroom there is still time for your team to come out of their funk. It is a game where most of us can play. You might not be really good but you can still toss the ball to your child. As Coach Bagshaw would say, “It’s like you are just playing catch kid, just throw to the glove.” I would like end by saying, “Play ball!”

Spring Break

It has been over two weeks since I have written my blog. I cannot think about what to write about, this might be caused by either of these two completely different things. The first is I have writers block, the problem is in order to have writers block you have to be writer so this cannot be the reason. The second is that nothing exciting has happened or changed in my life. But that is not it either. I guess I am just going to have to write about everyday stuff. I hope that is okay for my readers.

This week is Spring Break, and no group of people gets more excited about Spring Break than teachers. Students think they are excited; there is no school for a week. Parents don’t usually like it because they have to find someone to watch their children. Teachers however, have had this break on their calendars for months. It is not that we don’t want to be with children, we are teachers. But, we do need a break also. This is also the last break until school is out so we (teachers) cram as much R and R in as we can.
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This week I have with the help of my kiddos cleaned the garage, cleaned the house, got all of the laundry caught up, and had some time to myself. I also was able to get done at school what needed to get done. It is parent teacher conferences next week so there were some things that I needed to finish so I could be ready for that. I also had time to reread the Hunger Games. This was a must on my list for Spring Break.

Today I am going to hang out with a friend that I just don’t get to see much anymore. Tomorrow will be a restful day and Saturday is a momma daughter date day. So why is Spring Break so important? Everyone needs a break and sometimes the weekends are long enough. Trust me I have had some weekends that needed to end on Friday night. Hopefully we don’t have too many of those. We need to be able to put on our jammie pants and lounge around the house or sleep in for a few hours. I have yet to do that over break. Sometimes we just need to get caught up on our to do list. That is what I have spent this break doing. I am glad that my garage has a floor; I was beginning to think it didn’t. I am glad the floors got mopped and bathrooms scrubbed because sometimes I don’t have time on the weekends to get it done. Yes my kids do their chores but between play practice, babysitting, working, and homework the time for the big chores isn’t always there.

Well I guess I better end my blog, I can now cross off another item on my list. For all of my Havasu friends I hope you have an enjoyable rest of your break. I think I might take a mid morning nap.

New Adventures

So a few months ago I was putting children in cars after school. This is the one part of day that I enjoy; no it is not because it is the end of the day it is because I am good really good at that part of my job. I was calling kids and I noticed that I had only two or three kids left. I then saw a truck pull up I didn’t recognize the driver but the passage was Bobby’s (names have been changed) dad. I put Bobby in the car said, “Hello,” to dad and shut the truck door. The next day the same thing happened. This time as I put Bobby in the car the driver called me by my first name. I was taken back mainly because I usually get Ms. Fallis, and secondly I had no idea who the driver was.

The driver asked if I recognized him, I said no and then he told me his name. I couldn’t believe it, it was my favorite home teacher from church. We talked for a few minutes and then traffic started moving again so I had to get back to my job. It was nice and then we decided to become Facebook friends. He was off to some country like China, the Congo, or Singapore. All I knew was that it took a passport so it wasn’t anything I needed to really know about.

Two weeks ago when I put Bobby in the car, his dad informed me that my friend was coming home soon and would be coming to Havasu in a few weeks. I sent my friend a cute FB message and left it at that. Last week I was excited to see a message from my friend. It was something nice. We made some plans and that was good enough for me. Yesterday was my friend’s birthday, the only reason I knew this was because of FB. I thought I now have his number I will text him a birthday message. I sent a text and then he sent one back; this went on for about 20 minutes. The whole time I am thinking I should just call but I don’t know the rules of calling guys anymore.
I texted something very funny that instead of getting a text message the phone rang. I didn’t know what I should do, so I picked it up. I was afraid I had offended him and that was the last thing I wanted to do. Luckily, he was laughing on the other end. We talked for 197 minutes. I didn’t get anything done that I was supposed to but I was okay with that because I was having fun. Today we talked for another 218 minutes (yes I had to look it up) I have laughed harder in the last few days and he even made me cry. Not on purpose just because I was getting told that I might have to learn some things about cars.

I have had a lot of fun reconnecting with this friend. It is fun to talk to someone that knows you and has no qualms about who you are. A person that thinks you are funny, quick, and maybe even a little pretty. I am glad to have someone that wants to be my friend.

Now before I get a bunch of emails or messages saying, “Flo, you have friends.” I am not saying I don’t. I am just saying that sometimes it is nice to have a guy friend that is single. It is also nice that this friend knows my beliefs and morals. He might not be rated PG10 like Noelle but he understands where I stand on issues and won’t try to get me to break any of what I call, “The big ten.”

Gitten Out of Dodge

This last week I had to opportunity to git out of Dodge. (Yes I know I spelled the get as git) I am using gitten because I was in a car from Texas and in Texas gitten and git are correct grammar. I was able to go to San Diego for a reading conference. It was an amazing conference and I heard from wonderful speakers but that is not what I am going to write about. I want to focus on the country mouse and city mouse.

Susie Fox, Ashley Miller, Sandy Breece, and I arrived in San Diego at about 7:00 Arizona time 6:00 California time and we were a little late for dinner. We checked in really quick at the Hilton and we were able to have our own room. This was exciting for me because I have not had my own bed for the longest time. (Noelle has been sleeping in my bed for a while again.) How was I going to sleep if I did not have someone kick me all night? That thought would have to wait because I had to get ready for dinner.

We then went down to the restaurant for dinner. We were welcomed warmly and I felt like I was already home with new friends. I sat at the foot of the table mainly so I could have a great view of all my new friends. Joye Sanchez was so nice and she sat opposite from me at the table, Valerie Ritchey was our host, Delia McCraley, Rosa Tubbs, Cynthia Piper, and Sandra McCartney were now my new friends. As the waiter handed me my menu I almost cried. I did not know what half of the items on the menu were and the cost of the food was way over my budgeted amount of ten dollars. I had to ask what risotto was. I had never heard of it, but that was not the worst of it. There were too many spoons, forks, and knives. I had to try to remember what fork went with what course. I also forgot that a soup spoon comes with soup. In my kitchen you would use the regular spoon for soup. On special days if you wanted a bigger spoon you could use the serving spoon.

I did learn a few things at my fancy dinner. First, you should never say, “This is a lot different from the McDonald’s dollar menu.” You might hear laughter or gasps. Second, if you act like you know what is going on you might be able to fool a few people. Third, dinner is always fun with friends and family. Lastly, conversation is a great thing to share at dinner. The conversation was not the same as my dinner table with the kids but, it was super and I even was able to use some grown-up words.

I am grateful for the opportunity to git out of town mainly because it made me miss my kids so much I was happier to be home with them. I decided I am not cut out for the city life, this country mouse is happy with her little life here. I will always remember my trip to the big city of one of laughter and learning new things. I want my new friends to know that I had a wonderful time spending those few hours with them. They might remember it as the night they met a really nice lady that had no idea what the real world was like but for me it was one of the most memorable nights of my life.