Why I Do What I Do

It is Mother’s Day and I thought it would be appropriate to write today, about the importance of mothers. I have been blessed to have three wonderful mothers in my life. First, my own mom Maggie Howells, she gave birth to me and taught me the importance of taking a chance and following a dream. Second, my step mom Nola Philpot, she taught me about the importance of being a listener. Third, is Kim Fronek, she taught me that just because you are not blood does not mean you can’t love someone like a mom. Each of these women is important to my life and has led me to become the mom I am today. Now I would be remiss if I didn’t mention my biggest cheerleader growing up and that was my Grandma Philpot. All three moms know that they have a piece of my heart but growing up for me would have been less than desirable if my Grandma Philpot wasn’t there. I often feel bad for my cousins and younger siblings because they didn’t get to see or know the Grandma I saw. My mom like all mothers had her flaws. She was an excellent cook, cleaner, canner, and seamstress. It is sad when your lowest grade in my entire education comes in sewing and you had the best teacher in your own home. My mom taught us to work together and try hard. Nola had to become a mom instantly to a teenage daughter. That alone is worth a ribbon. Kim came into my life when I needed a mom close by. We had just moved to Havasu and didn’t know very many people. I was her visiting teacher and the rest is what they say, history. Each of these ladies has shown me what I need to do to become a better mom. I am not a perfect mom, far from it. I have my struggles like all other moms, mine just happen to be more obvious than others. My biggest struggle with motherhood is my homemaking skills. This does not include my house or laundry just my lack of cooking abilities (or desires) and craftiness or lack of. When you grow up in a “Mormon” household there are some expectations. First, cooking is the most important thing you can do for your family. My sisters enjoyed cooking so I was happy to let them stay in the kitchen and I would fold laundry. Trust me there was not complaining from my siblings or the mom of the house while I was folding laundry and not cooking. This left me as a poor excuse as a mom. I can cook, but I hate it! I am not a cook baker either as my friend Brian and Leslie will attest to. My skills as a mom have been housecleaning, laundry, organization, and calendaring. These are all very important skills to have as a mom. This does not mean that sometimes my house looks like a hurricane it or that I am late picking someone up from a certain place. It does mean I am a work in process. My greatest skill is my love for my kids. I love them more than anything else on earth. This is the key to being a great mom. This week I had an opportunity to take off my mother’s hat for a few hours. It was fun and I loved being a woman and having someone take care of me for a change. There isn’t anyone that doesn’t love getting gifts. I enjoyed being told I was wonderful and beautiful. Who wouldn’t? I felt like a how many women must feel when a gentleman treats them nicely. I have been reminded this week of my high moral stance on certain items. I have reminded people that my high moral stance doesn’t need to be everyone’s but when the children were younger there were promises made on what their moral up bringing would be. Now that I am a single mom I have to keep those moral stances no matter what. This week I thought long and hard about the moral high ground I have kept. This is was very easy when no one was interested or when someone was 7,500 miles away. This was not so easy when they were right in front of me. What I learned was the reason why my moral high ground is so important to me is that I have to be the example no matter what. I also learned that someone would lose respect for me if I all of the sudden threw out “rule number 1.” This does not mean I am right on everything, it just means I am right in decisions that I made long ago. So the reason why I do what I do is because I want my kids to know that when mom says something it is not just lip service. When I say certain things I mean it and I also follow it. It is not always easy to do the right thing but it is always right! Wrong is never right and right is never wrong. I would like to conclude by quoting President Abraham Lincoln, “All that I am or ever hope to be I owe to my angel Mother.” Thanks again to all of those moms to my kids and myself.